trick-r-treat

I like silly horror movies. I can’t imagine them being anything but goofy actually. The entire genre is based on two things, blood and boobs. Sure, the word suspense is thrown in there, but it’s usually the suspense of wondering when the next nude, violent or violently nude scene will occur. Very few movies, like Jacob’s ladder, get the correct mix of suspense, violence and horror, plus we get to see a naked Tim Robbins thrown into a tub full of ice. So unless a horror movie is going to be on that intense psychological level, I prefer it to be over the top with violence and funny. It would be even better if the movie tried to be funny and actually was.

Trick R Treat is a new Halloween horror movie from Bryan Singer and Michael Dougherty, released by Warner Brother’s direct to video department, Warner Premiere. It stars a whole host of people you don’t know you know until you see them, like Brian Cox, Dylan Baker, Tahmoh Penikett, Brett Kelly and Leslie Bibb. I dare you, try to picture them without hitting up IMDB, you can’t, but once you see them you go “HOLY CRAP! It’s that creepy dude who played the Lizard!” or “OMG! The kid from Bad Santa!”

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The cast also has the legendary Anna Paquin, reprising her role as a virgin for the third time in a major motion picture. This girl just can’t seem to get laid, and when she does it involves mutant freaks, werewolves and vampires. First she plays Rogue in X-Men, who drains the life out of anyone she touches, making it hard to get to first base. Then she plays Sookie in True Blood, who can read minds, which being a guy I can confirm would send any sane woman running for the hills and then in Trick R Treat, she plays the role again, with an amusing twist at the end when she finally “gets some”.

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Trick R Treat is a collection of five stories that all take place on Halloween night, each one weaving into the other to give an overall plot, much like the classic Tales from the Crypt or Creepshow. They open with a young couple who makes the deadly mistake of blowing out a Jack-o-Lantern before midnight, a high school principal that revives the old razor blade in the candy trick, the virginal Anna Paquin and her gal pals try to get her laid, some teens explore the trick part of trick or treating with the expected results and finally Brian Cox battles the pumpkin headed dead on the cover of the movie.

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I enjoy the short story themes, because honestly most horror movies run out of steam after 30 minutes anyway, this cuts out all the filler and gives you 5 condensed stories that unfold beautifully. You get the blood, you get some splashes of nudity which oddly enough Anna keeps her clothes on (I guess she has an exclusive nudity clause with True Blood) and you get a lot of quirky, funny scenes and even a few honest scares. Trick R Treat is a fun time and great to have playing on a loop during your Halloween Parties.

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